emotionally unavailable

Probably just maybe
i've been through too much high-high and low-low for not-really-love-but-more-like-crush type of affairs.
Im just so fed up with love now.
What exactly is love to me?
What exactly is love doing good to me?
Excitement, something keep me hyper.
Something makes life starting to become enjoyable.


So cheers to those brought-me-to-heaven-n-push-me-down-to-earth affairs, in the name of so-called LoVe.

Tryyy

It's been a little more than a year.
So here i am,
sipping white wine in my room, so familiar as always like a daily routine back in New York,
the only difference is this time...

• i am in Taipei, Taiwan- A city I had been craving for, and i have been living here for more than a year.
• My relationship status is Single- A status i did not specifically dreamed for but i'd enjoyed for a solid year, and now it has become my major concern.
• I am an Assistant Buyer at a high end fashion select shop- A full time job with the title that I could ever dreamed of

Many things have changed, new faces, new environment, new pretty much bloody everything.

Frankly speaking, i've been trying or not
to live on with my own life.
Regardless how difficult it is.

mommy taLK

After speaking to my mom through Facetime, I feel much much better now.

My hysterical temper has been cooled down a lot.

It was the line of " Just 自己過自己的生活" does the magic

Focus on my life, just go for what my heart wants.

Chill Out!!!!!

Stop questioning myself, 爽高調就高調

沒在怕的

剩下兩個月

反正船到橋頭自然直

i got my back-up plan.

Just be happy, and Be the self I wanna be.

alONE

為什麼就不能用豁然開朗的心情來面對 一一一一成不變的生活

或許可以又假裝 把情緒低潮歸咎於 大姨媽

知道不可以放任自己把情緒無限放大

但是全世界 好像只有我在原地踏空

其實我很難過

我只是在默默的 等著那一天

when i am able to let everything go,

no longer thinking about consequences or any scenarios,

just go ahead and start over with my new journey alone.

C @ Work

Wanna

I wanna Get High. I wanna make my life enjoyable. I am going Out.

Losing it

Somehow I feel a rush of jealousy.

I know it's unacceptably Immature

BUT....

it feels like she is trying to replace me..god just like how crazy it sounds, i know it's horrible for me to think it that way

but she is one of the good friends i am very closed to

She already took my best fd down

and now she has to go for her. Great.

I hate it.

Why am I thinking she is stealing my fds

because that just never happened before,

And i am so insecure now and i feel super left out.

Okay, i just feel that Im losing it.

Get over it, C.