Lately what makes me smiLe

Food: Cheese Burger with French Fries from Mcdonald, 意仁露behind Sogo
Addiction: Killing Zombies and ODIN no.3(just can't resist from the perfume smell)
Shame: No more Dexter....(Last Episode is SAD) Bye Dex....
Possession: 2 Rings + 1 Handbag and ODIN no.3
Project: Working on my Jewelry Biz (Initial Stage)
Urge: Dye my hair...
Oh and this cute polar bear I ran into in eslite haha

Confidence

I just need confidence

Absolutely confident with myself

Problem solved.

Pause

I'm with a man I'm not in love with.

That's it.

What I like about him is I thought he would love me without expectation

Turns out, you can never take anyone for granted

Why am I with him is what I shall ask myself

Because I'm insecured as aging 

Perhaps it's time to be happily alone without feeling lonely 

Pause

I'm with a man I'm not in love with.

That's it.

What I like about him is I thought he would love me without expectation

Turns out, you can never take anyone for granted

Why am I with him is what I shall ask myself

Because I'm insecured as aging 

Perhaps it's time to be happily alone without feeling lonely 

All that matters

I guess there is nothing much left to say

It was hard to hear, but I heard it.

I am seeking to someone who would be there, when I'm down. 

The line he said was just too unpleasant for me to repeat it, to remind myself what kind of person he is.

So I guess he wants to be with someone who is cheerful 24/7. 

Telling me that I'm pulling up with a mad face? Is that why u decided to rather spend your time with your friends or mine instead of cheering me up n accompanying me for this very last bloody fucking night？

Whatever, I don't even care. It's no longer my concern and please I got better things to care about.

Dare

Do I dare

I don't know...

One thing I'm sure of

Haha... Does it even matter now

Difficult for whom

I've been to heaven, I've been to hell, Ive been to New York, and God knows where.

Don't tell me it's difficult for both of us, you have no clue what kind of life I've been having since I left. 

No matter how much I want to draw an end to the destructive path of mine, the memory has always haunted me.

I'm haunted by the ghost of memory.

My mental is so fuked up now n I just don't know how to make it right. I don't even know how to live with myself. 

Do you have any idea what kind of life i live in- the life I constantly don't want to spend any second longer to be sober?

I just want to stay unconscious so I don't resent myself and my life.